do i look fat in these leather chaps?

now playing: nick drake, “pink moon”

i don’t handle responsibility well, i don’t think.

i’ve been handed quite a bit extra lately, here at work, and my knees are buckling. i know that ultimately, i’m going to get my feet planted and get a good push to get myself righted…but i just want to crawl under my desk today and forget that i’m a grownup.

my daughter is home, sick as hell – and i think i’m next, because my voice is moving slowly into harvey fierstein territory…i’ll soon be running through the offices, screaming, “david! david! why did i just put my mother on a plane to atlanta?” and, of course, this’ll be all well and good here today, but tomorrow night stone road plays a biker thanksgiving party, and i dunno how forgiving they’ll be when i sing my medley of air supply songs with this voice…i mean, i know how forgiving and sensitive those guys can be, but you just don’t sing those great old air supply songs without being able to give it your all, man. i mean…they might get angry. if i’m not one hundred percent, then they may take to idle chatter during our set…or worse, get up and move to the hors’duerves table while i’m singing…and, maybe – just maybe – if they’ve been drinking early enough…they may ask the entertainment committee not to bring us back next year. how completely and utterly brash.

if this appears to be the case, though, and they’re not responding, then we’ll have to pull out the heavy artillery and throw some rowdy, rambunctious music at them.

yes, that’s right.

i’m talking about heavy music, man. stuff like tom jones or maybe even michael bolton!! so a word to the wise, you leatherclad fuckers…we’re gonna rock your world tomorrow night! whoooooohooooo! yeaaaaaaaaaa!

now, sing with us….

“maaaakin’ looooooove…oudddda nuthin’ at aaaaaaaalllllll…..”

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